On To bigger and Better Things.

In the time since I've last written, I have...graduated. Yeah, that's about all. Honestly, everyone makes graduation out to be a huge deal, but I don't see it. Like, whoopie you have completed the easiest part of your life, go get 'em.

I do apologize for not writing for so long. Ever since mom discovered my blog, I've kind of drifted away. I guess I don't feel safe anymore. This was my haven, my place where I could say absolutely anything, and now that fragile shell has be broken and I never know if she's reading this or not and that scares the hell out of me. Well, that, and I've proven time and time again that I am really good at starting things and really shitty at finishing them.

But, I digress. So, work. See, I don't get Penney's. We have people who are literally working nine hours a week because of 'payroll cuts' and shit, and they just hired six new people! Like, give hours to the people who are good workers and who need them, first, please and thank you. But, my hours have been ok. We've gotten like two new people in as many weeks. What sucks is some of my favorite people are leaving me. Rachel's heading down to Columbus for school, Ashley's going to Miami University in the fall, and Danielle just kind of stopped showing up. No one really knows what's going on, so asking around has been totally useless. But, I've had the last two days off, so when I go in this evening, there should be a whole slew of news/gossip for me to hear. I'm really a terrible gossip,it's horrible.

And knitting, yes. Did I ever talk about the placemats? I don't know. Well, back when I first started to knit, I decided to make my mom placemats for her Christmas present. I'm almost done with the last one. See, I really underestimated how long it would take me to make six of these, so I only had three done by Christmas, with the promise that the rest of them would be done by February at the latest. But, to someone who wants to keep learning new stitches and new techniques and stuff, they were so boring. So I worked on baby socks and hair bows and a lot of other things while occasionally doing the placemats. But I have one more section on my last one, then I'm finally done. I can't wait to never ever ever ever ever have to make those again. Easy, but very boring. My next project is a sweater for me. I'm super excited. It's a ballet sweater, one of those that ties right under your boobs. Here's the thing though: the yarn they wanted me to use, I looked around online for and hour and couldn't find it and when I did, it was like $38 a ball and I needed like four, so no thanks. So I went internet hunting and found some much cheaper, much prettier, yarn. It's going to be black, charcoal gray, and a really deep primrose. I'm super excited. I have the rest of the yarn and a ball winder that should hopefully be arriving from Amazon today, so I'm going to finish that placemat in the next day or two (knock on wood) then it's onto the sweater! I am really so excited about this. I will wear it everyday.

Well, the Alternative Press Music Awards are a month away and I haven't even asked anyone to go with me. I literally don't even care if I find someone or not, I am going to this and not even mom will stop me. She told me that if I go 'against her wishes' and go by myself that there will be consequences, but what she doesn't consider is that I understand that perfectly, but I think the risk is totally worth it. Plus, AP has special commemorative issue magazines, four of them, Andy Biersack, Oli Skyes, Patrick Stump, and Brendon Urie, so yeah, I'm gonna buy those and hopefully a signed Brendon Urie poster.

My grad party is soon. The 29th, I think. How much planning and preparing do you think I've done. Yup, none. Well, that's not entirely true. I've started looking though pictures on my computer to figure out which ones I want. I did not realize how many selfies I took. A fuckton, man! Anyway, we're slowly getting that going.

Dad is still going to Texas. he leaves Sunday. He wants us all to fly out to see him sometime in August. It is hell on earth, let me tell you. First of all, this company has changed his departure date like twenty times, so I don't want to ask for the dates off of work yet because they'll probably change. And mom is mad because she doesn't want to go. She's scared of flying and she think Alan will be a hassle. I mean, maybe she can grow the fuck up and just deal? I don't know. And the other night mom and dad sat us all down for a meeting in which they said that we'd have to help around the house and listen to mom while dad's gone. I have two problem with this. One: They kept going to about how we would have to really step it up with cooking, cleaning, and watching Alan. They made it seem like dad actually did some of that, which he in no way ever did. In my eighteen years of life, I never remember him once helping us clean the house. Then they tell us that we'll need to help out even more since he'll be gone. Yeah, go fuck yourselves. And two: mom has a damn martyr complex. She gave us a whole speech about how we can't walk all over her while he's gone and we'll have to respect her and on and on and on. Listen, I know it makes me seem like a terrible and ungrateful teenager, and maybe I am, but I respect my parents enough and probably more than they deserve. See, I don't care who you are, parent, teacher, boss, whatever. I will give you basic respect because that's what I've been raised to do. If you want anything more than that, fucking earn it. Mom told me once that it was my job to respect her weather she deserved it or not, because she was my mother. I don't agree with that. She's not immune to criticism and disrespect just because she gave birth to me. I should be allowed to speak my mind to her, but I rarely do because if you upset her, she gets so pissy and won't speak and everyone just get all hot and bothered.

But yeah, I think I'm done. Probably, no one read all the way to the end, but thanks if you did. I realize that no one reads this blog anyway, but it's nice to be able to scream into a chasm, even if that chasm is only cyberspace.

Basketball, Texas, and Concerts

Yeah, I'm going to a basketball game Sunday. The Cleveland Cavaliers, I think? I'm not really that into sports but my dad's doing a little family outing thing. It should be fun though. As long as my mom doesn't ruin it. she always seems to get really bitchy whenever we do family things that aren't church related. It's like she gets personally offended by all the people who aren't Christians or something, so then she gets super pissy, which is just awesome, let me tell you. Other than that though, it should be fun. I think my dad's doing it to make up for the fact that he's gonna be gone? I don't know, but it seems like he's been trying to do more with us?

Speaking of Texas, the company is actually gonna have him on a project in Columbus for like six weeks or something, so he'll be gone during the week and back up here on the weekends. After that ends, I think he's supposed to have a week or two, then it's off to Texas. I've said it before and I'll say it again, I don't think it's going to be a big deal. We'll adjust like we do every other time, and we'll get used to it. I think my mom and Ariel are going to have the hardest time. I honestly don't really care either way.

Remember The Colourist? That band I love (Well, one of the many bands I love) Yeah, they're going to be in Columbus on their first headlining tour, and guess when it is?! Yeah, Sunday. So, I'm going to miss it and I'm super bummed. I wanted a chance to see/meet Kollin, since I didn't last time I saw them. Also, Night Terrors of 1924 are opening for them and I love them, so I'm missing that too. Oh well, I think they're going to have a great career, so maybe in the future. Panic! at the Disco is touring this summer though, so I'm totally planning on going to that.

Texas (Again) and New Music

So dad apparently accepted the offer so he'll be leaving for Texas by the end of the month. I think it'll be fine. Honestly, I'm not really bothered by it either way. It's weird but things like that very rarely actually bother me. Usually I'm indifferent one way or the other. I know everyone else in my family is like freaking out about it and I'm just like, 'I bought new yarn for my project.' Which is totally true by the way, I did buy some yarn yesterday. It's a cute wool/nylon blend. I'll post some pictures soon, once I've started. I'm gauging it currently, so that make take a few days.

I've been listening to Silverstein while doing school today. Andrew from work reccommended them. We got on the subject of Canadian musicians and he said that his favorite band hailed from there, Silverstein. I had heard of them but never actually listened to them. They're very good. I wasn't aware that they were Canadian. Oh, the things you learn when you talk to your favorite person at work.

I've been reading Dan Brown's new book, Inferno, the last few days. I'm such a fan of his. When I first starting reading books other than what I found in the young adults section, his Robert Langdon books were some of the first I read. I love looking for symbols in things ever since I was a kid, so I just fell in love with everything he wrote.

I'm hoping to finish school here real soon, then I need to clean my room, do some laundry, and then hopefully curl up in my chair and read and knit till I have to get ready for work.

My dad, My sister, and Texas

So, it's really looking like he might be doing the Texas thing. But apparently he and my older sister were talking about it and she got really mad and started crying and shit. Moment of honesty, do you want to know why I think she's so upset about it? Of course you do, you're reading my blog. I know Ariel well enough to know that she's really self-obsessed and she hates to be inconvenienced in any way. That's what it boils down to, she doesn't want anything to change because she hates change. I don't mean this to be whiny or rude, but my dad has always been a lot more involved in Ariel's life more than he has been in mine or Alana's, so she and I are far less affected by this than Ariel is. She doesn't want him to leave because she depends on him when she needs anything like her car's acting up or any little thing. Maybe she can start getting off her ass and actually doing shit rather than having dad or us do it all the time, hmm? Anyway, he's supposed to be making a decision, well, yesterday I think but he probably hasn't yet. I should know soon though, but I'm pretty confident he's choosing Texas.